Can Working Out Qualify as Meditation?

I am five foot three inches tall and I weigh right around two-hundred pounds. Overt he last few years I have lost, and kept off, about eighty pounds. Knee problems, diabetes, kids, and a hormone disorder contributed to my weight gain. Oh and the fact I fucking love food.I am not one of those people who sits back and cries, "Oh I don't know how I got so over weight!" I do know. Most of it was medical, but there was a healthy dose of fat-ass eating in there too. 

As I was working out tonight while watching Sons of Anarchy Season Two that I got for ten bucks (yea, I'm proud of that. Bow to me. lol) , I had a thought. Is working out like mediation? In meditation  well at least mindfulness meditation, you have to keep reminding yourself to focus on the breath. Over and over we have to, compassionately, tell our minds to focus on the breath. when I work out I have to remind myself that I can do this or that the result is worth it. Is that the same thing? 

I know I've heard walking meditation mentioned in Dharma talks. I would think that working out and clearing your mind of everything but what you are doing in that moment would be about the same. I would imagine there are many things that we do that involve emptying our minds and being mindful of our current actions that are a lot like meditation. 

I try to mediate at least once a day. Usually it is a guided mediation because that helps me since I am still so new. I have noticed that now, instead of jumping straight into I;ll mess a bitch up mode, if I get angry I will stop, breathe and think about my next step. It's help tremendously. 

What do you do in your everyday life that is like meditation but isn't actually meditation?

The New Girl Deals With Loss

Today my dog died. He was a great boy. I've had him for 14 years. since before I had kids or a husband. He was my first son. In recent months he had developed a degenerative spine disease. I knew he probably wouldn't make it passed Christmas, but it was still shocking for me. When I found him this morning it was clear it was the end. I bathed him, he loved warm water, I dried him, I wrapped him in a blanket and I prepared to let him lay with me until it was over. Because that is what you do for family. An hour or so in, he started crying and I absolutely couldn't deal. I called the vet, put Julian in a box with a pillow and a blanket, packed up my 4 year old, and took him in to have him euthanized. As we sat in the waiting room, my hand stroking his head, my boy passed. They had to refund my money, it was the strangest thing.

Of course, I cried like a baby. I buried him and then walked around on the verge of tears for the rest of the day. My kids took it better than I did, though my 9 year old has made a few comments about how he misses him. Death sucks. Death reminds us that none of us are permanent. Nothing is permanent.

Nine hours later I'm still sad. I've thought I saw him in the house twice. That being said, I'm taking it a million times better than I thought I would. Partially because he was in pain and partially because of the Dharma talks I've been listening to.

Tonight, to try and find some level of acceptance or at least not be quite so sad, I went searching for a talk that would speak to me. This is the one I found http://againstthestream.org/audio/item/on-loss

Against the Stream is such an amazing resource if you are a budding Buddhist in a place where the community is non-existent. I would love to go sit down on a floor pillow and listen to a Dharma talk with like minded people, but that is not something I can do in my area. With the audio of the Dharma talks from Against the Stream I can put one my headphones and hear the talk and feel like I'm there as I hear the cars pass by, the people shifting, all the ambient noise as if I'm there. I love it.

If you are looking for information and reading isn't your thing, Against the Stream is probably the resource for you. Many nights I've found myself on the site just listening to Dharma talks for hours.When I go to Nashville in February I'm going to try to see if I can go to the Against the Stream Center there.When I saw that they had one there I looked at my husband and said, "Holy shit, dude, Ryan Hurst AND an Against the Stream, that shit is a fucking sign," yes, I am a sailor and yes I do call my husband dude often.

So, check out Against the Stream. They are amazing. And think positive thought s for me and being able to go to Nashville and if I do get to go that Ryan Hurst doesn't have to cancel or something. Basically, lets hope everything aligns.

Angry Girl on a Mission

Humbling from Staten Strong and My Shirt Comes Home

A couple of amazing things happened here in Ohio today. First, I got online this morning and made my daily PSA for Staten Strong, a cause close to my Angry Girl heart, and a little while later I saw this

I feel so humbled. I help Staten Strong because I see the pictures and I think that could be me, my community, my friends, and it's a no brainer to try and get the word out there. I definitely carry this cause in my heart and always will. I think that we often reactively give to these causes that stem from natural disasters and then, slowly, as the media attention fades we forget and move on. It takes years to recover from something like this. I'll put it this way, there are still areas hit by Katrina that have yet to fully recover. Staten Island will need our help for the long haul and they deserve it. They shouldn't have to do this alone. I intend to remind people of this cause as often as I possibly can. Spread the word. 

Staten Strong site where you can donate or buy a shirt or hoodie and show your Staten Strong pride

www.statenstrong.com

Staten Strong Twitter 

https://twitter.com/StatenStrong

Theo Rossi (one of the founders and cast member of Sons of Anarchy) Twitter

https://twitter.com/Theorossi

Staten Strong Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/StatenStrong

The second half of my day came with the arrival of THE shirt.The shirt that started it all. The story behind the shirt is here, but if you follow my blog then you probably know what the hell I'm going on about. You know, I sat down today and I thought about everything I've changed in the last few months and I cried. So many things have been given back to me through this new path. No matter how many causes I help, how many individuals I help, how much compassion I show I can never do enough to thank the universe or whatever for just having Ryan Hurst get dressed in this shirt. Such a simple thing to do to give a girl her life back. 

How can I ever accurately describe the gratitude I feel, without seeming like that weird stalkery girl from the internet, if I get to meet him in February? Will it seem stupid to him? Will it seem like I've misplaced all this gratitude? I hope not. I hope that I somehow find the words to be able to explain to him what he did for my life. I have so many things running through my head about it. How do you get someone to understand something like this without seeming psycho? If you know, help a girl out. If I get to do that then I feel like this will have gone full circle.

I wear this shirt proudly. 

I will continue to use my blog to share my everyday experiences in growing on the Buddhist path, to help Staten Strong, and sometimes even just to make you laugh. I don't care if anyone ever comments again. If I reach even one person then it's worth it to me. If Ryan Hurst wearing a shirt and a thank you from Staten Strong (when I don't think I did much to be thanked for) have taught me anything it is this: Help any way you can, strive to touch people's hearts, leave an indelible mark of compassion on all that you do. 

 Angry Girl Humbled. 

Forgiveness Starts With Me

So, you'll remember a couple of weeks ago my dilemma about my husband's family and Thanksgiving. I went back and forth about whether I was going to go or not. Eventually, I had decided to go. We bought all the stuff to make food, I always make his Grandma's homemade butterscotch pie, and everything seemed ok.

Until yesterday. It was D-Day and I was freaking out. We were supposed to be there at 5, but his sister called and said just get there as soon as we could. I hadn't started the pies yet and I don't handle schedule changes well before I've thoroughly medicated myself. So, I freaked out on my husband then apologized because I realized that I wasn't meeting the situation with compassion and kindness. I went into the kitchen and popped my anxiety meds to which my husband laughed and asked if I wanted him to put them in a pez dispenser. My answer, "Only if it's shaped like the TARDIS." About halfway through making the butterscotch for the pies I realized that I could feel the panic attack building up on the periphery. There are few feelings worse than a panic attack you know is coming but can't really stop. Sighing, I turned to my husband and told him I didn't think I could do it.

At first I was disappointed in myself. I f I couldn't forgive these people how am I suppose to be able to meet situations like this with kindness and not anger. Then I realized something, I already was meeting it with compassion I wouldn't have had before. If this had been six months ago not only would I have not gone, but I would not have wanted anyone in my family to go. It sounds like a heartless thing to do, but I wouldn't have been able to stand being at home alone thinking about all the things they MIGHT be saying about me, but like Linda said, it's not my business what people think about me.

That statement is a powerful tool in life. So I'll say it again.

It is not my business what people think about me. 

Because of that single thought and trying to meet a situation with as much compassion as I could afford it, yesterday did not degrade into a knock out fight. There was no screaming, there was no yelling, All that happened was I calmly discussed it with my husband, forgave myself for not being able to bring myself to go, then allowed myself to see the situation with compassion and let my husband go without giving a damn what might be said.

When people asked me what I was thankful for on Thursday, without hesitation, I told them I was thankful for t-shirts that completely change lives. If you want to read that story I have it here. I really don't think there will ever be a way for me to truly express the level of gratitude I have for that man and his t-shirt. Literally this has changed the entire course of my life. I am so fucking thankful. Yea, the f-bomb is an appropriate way to express the level of emotion you have or at least I think it is. Maybe my gratitude is misplaced, I don't know. Maybe it is silly to be so thankful to someone for having a picture taken in a shirt that they probably didn't even really think about wearing, but I can't help but feel that way. So many things are different now.

I will never take for granted the smallest actions again.

My goal with this blog has always been to reciprocate on that small action. This blog is my T-shirt. I hope to be able to show people real life examples of how Buddhism can change your life. To give other Angry Girls and Boys out there the chance to see how simple and happy life can be. To give people the tools to change.


In February, Mr. Hurst will be in Nashville at a bike show. I have discussed it with the Husband and I am going to try to go. I am going try my damnedest to make this happen.  To be able to tell the man in person, "Thank you," would be a powerful thing for me. It might creep his ass out, lol, but that is a risk I'm willing to take.

Angry Girl

Angry Girl and Relationships

When you carry anger and resentment with you like your security blanket, your relationships suffer. As a married woman I can honestly say anger and resentment, no matter how easy they are to harbor, are poison to a marriage.

Sunday, this Angry Girl and her Husband went out on a date. We don't get to do it that often because it is hard to find someone to watch our kids. No idea why, it just is. So we go to  a movie and we go do some shopping, then we go out to eat. Somehow we get into a really deep discussion about our marriage as it was and how far I seem to have come in the last few months. This leads to my husband confessing that he knows he has treated me badly in the past and how sorry he is. I was shocked. Only a few months ago even trying to bring this up would have pissed me off. I would have been convinced it was just another ploy to blame me for shit I didn't cause. It is so easy to jump to anger when it is all you seem to be filled with. You can use anger as a shield and many people probably do.

Yesterday, for the first time in my adult life, I met the conversation with compassion and was mindful of my words and emotions. I understood that the past was just that, the past. It was a very healing moment for me. When you are full of delusions about how others feel about you how do you let them get their actual thoughts out? You don't because you don't want to hear the bullshit you are sure you are about to hear. The anger clouds your judgement. Don't let it. Don't waste your time with it. Seriously, don't. Meet the situation with compassion and allow yourself to grow passed it.

For the first time in a long time I feel like I may actually get to have a partner in life. It's exciting. I know we won't always get along because no one ever does. It's what impermanence is all about. It's nice to know that we can actually discuss things now.

Sunday cemented my commitment to this path. It made me that much more grateful to the odd turn of events that set me on this road. One day I will thank that person. I will. It may sound like a dumb thing to be resolved to accomplish, but for me this has been an eye opening few months. Relationships have been mended. I've been changed. I've learned so much that I hadn't understood before.

Anger is poison, guys, let it go at every opportunity you have.


Angry Girl Grateful

Oh, You really Hate My Black Weasley Guts? That's Cool, I'm Not Going to Suffer About It.

So, someone pointed out to me last week that what others think of you is none of your business. Isn't that a great thought? You hate me? That's none of my business. Awesome.

After that, I decided to listen to a Dharma talk about forgiveness. The Buddha said that if anyone is deserving of your forgiveness and compassion it is yourself. So in other words, if you are going to forgive someone forgive yourself fist. We are only human. We fuck up.

A lot of us hold on to the criticism laid upon them and then they internalize it and use it to criticize themselves. Hell, during meditation I criticize myself. I think we all do, apparently Noah Levine does and he's been doing this for a very long time. I have anxiety problems, so if I meditate after my medication has worn off for the day, good lord, forget about it. I have to remind myself to pay attention to my breath once every five seconds until I am screaming in my head, "Hey fucker, it's simple pay attention to the in and out of your fucking breath, come on, it isn't rocket science!"

Well in that Dharma talk I learned that I need to look at it more like," Dude, I get it, it's cool. I forgive you, lets try this shit again." But you can apply that to pretty much everything. You have to meet things that hurt you with compassion.That includes the words of others, but,like Linda said to me, it is also not our business what others think of us. It kind of makes you sit back and go, "Whoa, wait, all these years I gave a shit if people said mean stuff about me it was none of my business? But it was about ME, doesn't that inherently make it my business?" It isn't really about you. We are impermanent, we change from second to second. By the time gossip reaches you it has been out there a while, you aren't that person anymore. It's none of your business what other people think of you.

Forgiving yourself is hard. I can forgive myself in one minute for something and then five minutes later I'm thinking about that shit again. Blaming myself again. That's why they call it practice, you don't get it right away, you go at it with compassion and remind yourself you forgave yourself for that already. Offer yourself the forgiveness you can in that moment. If you need to do it again in another moment, do it.

So, I guess the moral of this blog is if the girl across the hall is telling people you are a a mindless piece of trash, it doesn't matter because it is none of your business. Forgive her, then when your mind thinks what a bitch she is five minutes later, forgive yourself for not being perfect, smile, and forgive her ass again.


Angry Girl Out.

Try Not to Take It Personal

So I've been learning about the whole not taking emotions personally concept.

It is kind of confusing at first. I sit and listen to the Dharma talk and think, "Um, how am I supposed to not see my guilt as MINE?" Of course, my feelings completely reflect my newness in this. From what I've gathered so far your emotions are part of the experience of life, they happen to everyone. Because they happen to everyone they aren't really yours. Instead of thinking, "My guilt is crushing me," it should be more like, "Yea, I see you there guilt."

It kind of goes along with the concept that there really is no self. Well, no permanent self anyway. even in our minds we constantly change from one minute to the next. We are very literally never the same.It's hard to pin down the self when there is nothing permanent about it. I was talking to a friend last night and trying to share this with her, but I don't think it came across well.

I'll get a grasp on it eventually.

Now, I'm curious, how many people frequent my blog and find it usefull? Leave a comment, say hello! I'm not going anywhere if you don't, but I'd like to meet you guys :)


Now, back to the Buddhism.

I find the Dharma talks at Against the Stream to be so helpful. When I feel frustrated I will listen to one or I will meditate and I feel a million times better. What are your experiences with Dharma talks? Have you ever listened to one?

Loving-kindness and Compassion, Sometimes Easier Said Than Done

This one is going to be a personal one, folks, so hold on and keep your hands and feet inside the blog at all times.

I am struggling with forgiveness and looking at a situation with loving-kindness. Just the one situation, mind you, but yea, I'm failing big time. When Brice was in the hospital his family actively tried to split us up. I hadn't seen him for a week and I had basically no food in my house. Shit was desperate. I had no idea if he had started the process for his disability. I had no idea what was going on. Also, at this time, I was completely unmedicated. My anxiety was being an asshat. It was terrible. I felt like I was on the verge of a panic attack 24/7. Every time I would call up to the hospital brainwashed Brice would tell me if I wanted to talk about money he was going to hang up because his step-mother had told him my stress inducing wad "not conducive" to his "healing environment". I hear those words in random order and it pisses me off to this very day. Then his cousin came up there and told him I was "talking shit" about him on facebook. Apparently, letting people know where he was, how they could reach him, and what the situation was is talking shit because I told them he didn't take his insulin and that is what caused it. There was a point where he told me that his step-mom was telling him he was going to go home with them and stay there until he healed. It took over a year for that to heal in the end.  So I would have basically been alone for a year.  At another point he told me his family thought we should get divorced.

Well, at that point I was done playing nice.

I went up there and told him either he wanted me and his kids or he wanted his family. Sometimes you have to break ties for a while to rid yourself of a toxic influence. I had been trying for years to get him to take his meds, constantly fighting for his life, while his family did nothing. The only time they did anything was when it was finally a critical thing and then all they did was try to convince him it was somehow my fault. While I was there I found out that his step mother went so far as to tell his doctor our house was so filthy he couldn't possibly come home. Yeaaaaa, my house isn't dirty.

Fast forward to last week, I've finally started trying to accept at least his sister again. I don't really want to, but I also don't want to harbor all the shit I have towards her. I'm trying. his sister calls and decides we are all going to get together the day after thanksgiving, Brice agrees, no one asks me. Maybe I'm expecting a lot of him to consider me, I don't know. I didn't say anything for a few days, but the more I thought about being in the same room with his step mom and his dad the angrier I got. Me, the girl who was trying, really trying to let go of all this emotional shit I'd been carrying around  and really doing it, was starting back at square one.

Finally, I realized I couldn't forgive these people.

I tried and tried, but I can't seem to do it. It's stressing me out. Finally I bring it up to Brice, I try to calmly tell him how I feel and a fight ensues. Now, I know none of this is worth everything it is causing and that my inability to let go is partially causing the suffering. How do I let this go? There has been a major breech of trust. I don't want to be around these people. Hell, we don't even usually see them on holidays. I don't know what to do. I need guidance, advice.

My question to you, when someone has hurt you so deeply how do you forgive them enough to be around them?

Help an Angry Girl out?

Staten Strong, by the people for the people!

Today was the launch of Staten Strong, a charity to directly help the people of Staten Island started by the people of Staten Island.

If you haven't been following the situation there, they have been left to fend for themselves, basically. the Red Cross and FEMA have both really let these people down, but through a grass roots effort of neighbors helping neighbors, they have managed to start gutting houses and getting debris taken care of. They need our help, though. It is a massive undertaking to clean up the mess left behind from this storm and meany people have been facing devastation losing everything. They need tools, plastic bags, rubber gloves, baby formula, diapers, blankets, money, you name it they need it. Please take a minute and donate whatever you can. We may not live on Staten Island, but these people deserve our compassion and respect. The heart in that community is something we should all strive towards having.

To Follow them on Twitter go here https://twitter.com/StatenStrong

To like them on facebook and see their store go here https://www.facebook.com/StatenStrong

To follow Theo Rossi, one of the founders, on twitter go here https://twitter.com/Theorossi

To follow me on Twitter go here https://twitter.com/ladylennon1964


Here is the link! www.statenstrong.org     Every little bit helps!

Please keep Staten Island in your hearts. They need our support for the long haul. It will take months for this clean up to happen.


Also, if you are a tourist in New York or you live in New York and have decided you want to see all the damage in Staten Island, please keep in mind this isn't TV these are people's lives. Be respectful, instead of going to take pictures and gawk consider volunteering and going out to help people rebuild!

Knits For Staten Island

Ok, I'm taking a moment out of my regularly scheduled blog to raise some awareness.

We all know how hard hit Staten Island and parts of New Jersey were by Sandy. One of the people I follow on twitter, the actor Theo Rossi, lives in Staten Island and his tweets have been like a play by play of the devastation. I've been shocked to learn that a lot of the help the people of Staten Island received was from themselves. It's actually pretty inspiring and a testament to the power of social media.  They've tweeted locations of base camps. They've tweeted what things people need, where people are giving away food, messages of encouragement to each other. I've been touched by the strength in Staten Island.

In general, when you think of New York you think of tough people who can be rough around the edges, but now, when I think of New York I think of the heart of the people in Staten Island.

Watching the pictures and tweets flow in requesting help and showing the absolute destruction, I knew I HAD to help. I had to do something, anything. I've felt that way during these kinds of disasters  before. If I didn't have three kids I would be one of the first to volunteer. I'm a hands on kind of gal. This time, though, was somehow different.  One of my closest friends grew up in Jersey and we spent a couple of nights looking at pictures and I was just amazed at the power of destruction the storm unleashed. In some areas the beach was in the town. It was insane to look at. I can't imagine what it  must be like to live through. So, between that and the tweets that Staten Island was receiving very little help, I wanted to take action.

I spent one whole day on hold with various charities in my area trying to find someone who was sending clothes and supplies out to New York, only to find none of them, including the local and state capital branches of the Red Cross, were sending anything but volunteers. I knew several people who wanted to donate things if I could find a way to get it DIRECTLY to Staten Island. I posted my struggle on facebook and my friend Bridgett sent me to a facebook page that was posting addresses accepting donations. I was elated. I went to the site and found mainly New Jersey addresses, so I posted what I was looking for and shortly after received an address that, much like Dori, I will always remember.

I started posting that address EVERYWHERE. My facebook, my twitter, anyone who asked, I gave it to them. As I saw links posted that offered a way to donate directly I passed them along. I decided I was going to send hand knitted hats in my care package. I wanted to send something that was hand made, something that says, hey, I took the time to put my heart into this because I thought you should know someone really cares you're having a hard time. I posted on Twitter that I was going to knit some hats for my box and a friend decided she would do the same. I was super excited, she even made a hashtag #Kinits4SINY .

Now, I'm asking you, why don't you knit for Staten Island? Recovery is going to take months, you have time. I bet the person who's head is warmed while they reroof a house that is just being finished in February will be glad you took the time to put your heart into some yarn and make a hat.


The address to send supplies to Staten Island is

Staten Island Recreational Association
599 Fr Capodanno Blvd.
Staten Island, NY
10305
Attn: Megan Delmar

They need cleaning supplies, underwear, batteries, tools, basic stuff. If you use it on a daily basis, they probably need it.

Here are a couple of links to fundraisers set up for people who lost their homes:

http://gogetfunding.com/project/chris-ostrow-hurricane-sandy-relief-fund

http://www.giveforward.com/forsterfamily?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=fb_wall&utm_campaign=vanity_page&og_action=hug&fb_ref=434154


Share this blog with your friends and family. Heck, share this blog with people you don't like very much. Lets make a difference no matter where we call home.

Keep Staten Island in your hearts.


Edited to include www.statenstrong.org a non profit for the people, by the people!

I'll Have What She's Having

You know, I know Buddhism has helped me be calmer, but I hadn't really seen it in absolute action until today.

Let me tell you something, I have anxiety problems out the ass. It is a huge problem fo me. I'm medicated, don't worry, but even then I sometimes flip out. Taking my three kids out to dinner causes me untold levels of anxiety. Often the phrase,"Amanda, are you flipping out," will pass the lips of my husband. Of course, I always glare at him, the heat of a thousand suns shooting from my eyes, and say,"No." I am flipping the fuck out, though. Inside my inner pissed off girl is doing somersaults and cussing like a sailor from 1941. It always ends with me needing to take a pill.

Today, we took the kids out to eat. It was already later than what we normally eat due to a doctor's appointment, so the kids were antsy and the oldest ADHD medicine had worn off. Waiting for a table the youngest and the oldest were fighting over who got to hold my hand and the youngest was blowing raspberries on my belly through my shirt. Meanwhile the middle child was eyeballing a lady who was very short of stature and, lets just say, he has no filter. All this going on and I am being bounced around like a damn ping pong ball and there stands the husband, oblivious.  I took a deep breath and I looked down at the middle child and said, "Don't even think about it." Then took care of the fighting over the hand situation. I was quickly moving into freak the hell out territory.

We get to our table and our waitress is clearly frazzled. That's fine,it's busy in there. We order our food and drinks and wait. Then we wait and wait some more. My husband has made three trips to the salad bar when our food arrives, but we still have no drinks. Now, my youngest son is infatuated with trying to touch the lady behind us, so I am still on pretty high agitation mode. When our drinks finally get there mine is still absent.

Normally, this would be where I get really pissed off and shut down. Instead, I made the choice to look at this in a compassionate light. She was busy, who knew what kind of day the woman was having. Be nice to her, smile, tell her it's no big deal. Because, really, in s the grand scheme it isn't a big deal. I got my drink and isn't that what I wanted all along?

After than I calmed down and my kids started to listen. I had a good time.

It's crazy how something as simple as trying to see things with love and compassion while being mindful of what's going on can really change a situation.

for the first time in about six years, I successfully went out to dinner with my family and did not need to take an anxiety pill.

A Proud Angry Girl.

Oh, That's Cool, That Shit Was Already Broken

So today's principal for discussion has to do with non-attachment to things.


Nothing is permanent. Not you, not me, not that lamp over there my kid is swinging from. Nothing. Often we have things that we become really attached to, I know I'm attached to  most of my stuff. If it breaks we get really upset. Like, seriously I hate you forever for breaking that upset.

The Buddha had this cup,  he always drank out of said cup and admired how the cup held his water. So one day, a student asked him why, if we are practicing non-attachment, was he attached to the cup. To this The Buddha replied, "Oh, this cup is already broken."


I heard that lovely tidbit in a Dharma talk by Noah Levine. And you know that moment where it feels like your brain just relaxes as something clicks into place, yea I had that.


Being attached to your stuff brings about suffering because stuff never stays the same, it always breaks. My Rock and Roll Hall of Fame cup that I swear makes my hot chocolate taste better, it's already broken. If you step back and you tell yourself, well, that's already broken, it isn't so disappointing when the stuff actually breaks. You probably won't be as apt to yell at the person who broke your stuff or try to  convince yourself you can fix it. You can just say, well, it was already broken.

All of this ties into one of the biggest points in Buddhism: Impermanence.

Absolutely nothing stays the same. From one second to the next everything changes. One of our key survival mechanisms seems to be ignoring that fact. As humans we want things to stay the same, to stay comfortable. We fight against change. fighting a process that takes place around you all day every day isn't really the wisest thing to do. It's a lot like standing on a train track and saying oh, that's not a train barreling towards me. Just because you pretend not to notice the train doesn't mean it isn't going to slam right into you.

By acknowledging change and practicing non attachment we make great strides toward removing ourselves from suffering. Things begin to get easier to let go of. You aren't quite so sad when your favorite shirt rips and can't be fixed.

Basically, let that shit go.


Angry Girl, swimmin against the stream.