Doubt is a huge hindrance in life. It hits you even when you are walking along cool as a cucumber and confident as ever. There you are, trotting along, and doubt pops up and says, "Oh hey, whatchya doin there? Don't you know you can't do that? It's too hard. It's just impossible for you."
The best part? You don't have to listen to doubt.
You can wave to it, say, "Oh I see you," and just keep right on doing what you're doing. That may seem like a really common sense statement, but unless you are mindful of your reaction to doubt then it is probably getting the better of you. I've let it get the better of me just recently. I was sitting down to write a letter just last night and my mind kept telling me, "This is a bad idea. This is too much. What the fuck are you doing?" and I listened and walked away. Today, though, I am determined to write the letter. Doubt can kick and scream in my head and I'll just smile and wave.
I think that, in regards to the Buddhist path, many people let doubt get the better of them. I know in my area there is absolutely no Buddhist community and without the talks and guided meditations at Against the Stream I may have given up. It's hard to do something so against the norm and be alone doing it. It's the time when doubt can be heard the loudest. Still, keep plugging along, it's worth it.
Last night I finished Against the Stream; A Buddhist Manual For Spiritual Revolutionaries. In a couple of days I'll do a post, complete with quotes, with my thoughts on it. I loved it. Seriously. I have also started reading something by Pema Chordron, a Buddhist Nun. So far I'm really enjoying it, too.
I've been really excited to see that I've been getting steady visits. Hello! I see you! Welcome to my blog!
Angry Girl
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