I have three kids. the oldest is 9 and then I have one that is 6 and one just about to turn 5. As I was showering this morning, saying, "Please shut the door," for what I was sure was the eight millionth time, I had an idea for a blog. Having kids really affects your practice. I know not all of your will get that, but it really does.
My oldest son is very into God and I'm ok with that. If he has questions I have to, typically, send him to his father because it has been years since I've been in a church and I don't really want to chance something I say may color his newly budding faith. Not far into my practice he started asking me questions about it. I was cool with that, too. He'd sit with me when I was meditating. It was awesome bonding.
Then, it happened- his younger brothers started taking notice.
Don't get me wrong. I love spending time with my kids, but when you're trying to be still and focus on your breath having two small children basically climbing on you like playground equipment is distracting. For a while, I would try to meditate after they were in bed. All that accomplished was me waking up to the sound of the bell saying, "Wait, what? Ugh, fuck." Then I decided to try to meditate while the two oldest were at school. One kids couldn't be that distracting, right? Nope, even when immersed in a video game world of lego people that explode to bits, he would come straight to me when he knew I was getting ready to meditate. It was like he had a psychic ability for it. He could be in the playroom engrossed by Boba Fett attacking a t-rex and still, as soon as I would let my butt hit the chair, he'd come running out.
Now, I don't know how many of you have tried to focus on your breathing while a small child is on you, but it goes something like this. Sit down, headphones on, guided meditation playing, breathe in and out, in and out, in and out, then BAM something is tugging your hair. You try to make do with the situation just as you hear, loudly, in your ear (that they have removed the earbud from) "Mommy! ARE YOU MEDITATING!" By that point, I just shut the laptop and try again another time.
Even trying to meditate in the shower fails horribly for me. It seems like every five seconds one of them in rushing in to tell me the latest injustice done to them by one of their brothers or they have to use the bathroom. I've considered learning how to say, "Shut the door," in as many languages as possible just to keep myself entertained. My goal for the year? I want to take an uninterrupted shower.I know, I know, I have lofty goals. I should probably aim lower because it is more likely that I will meet Chuck Norris, dressed in drag, on the corner of Main Street.
How many other Buddhist Moms are out there? I know you hear me. Share your own story, if you'd like!
Angry Girl
As a side note, it took me about forty-five minutes to write this blog. In that time I had to get a blanket,be pillow, open a remote controlled mini tank, have several conversations about the Army of Darkness, and avoid a meltdown.
No comments:
Post a Comment